How To Make Hostile Guests Love You (Part Two)

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Like the old saying, "you catch more fly honeys with vinegar..." or something like that.

Years ago I had the good fortune of working for a man named John Maria.  I have had many bosses over the years, but none had a better fundamental understanding of human nature than John.  One day he gave me a book and told me to read it.  He said the answer to almost every life problem was found in this book.  It was a pretty bold claim, but I did learn a great deal from reading the book.

I pulled out the book recently and read the chapter regarding this topic.  The book is called, “Get Anyone To Do Anything” by David J. Lieberman, PhD.  While the title is a bit of hyperbole (hence me writing this blog rather than living in Bill Gates’ mansion with Alyssa Milano) there is a great deal of wisdom in it.  Dr Lieberman gives incredible insight into human nature and how to use it to your advantage.

In the book, Dr Lieberman makes a very convincing argument that there are two important factors that primarily determine whether or not people like you:

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The Great Debate (Introduction)

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Available at tiptable.com

There are a number of topics about serving and restaurants that are open for debate.  The opinions are generally split between those who have been in the industry and those who have not.  It is very similar to the political process as it currently stands.  Most people have chosen either the Server Party or the Guest Party.  This moderates in the middle are enough to give either side a majority opinion.  The two parties are as opinionated and uncompromising as the political ones.  There seems to be one issue that even the moderates are split on.  Whether it is acceptable to leave less than 15% when the service is poor.

I discussed this issue with a couple of friends from high school.  It took all sorts of different turns.  If everyone gets 15-20%, isn’t that punishing servers who deserve 20%?  Can even an educated guest know all the factors that contribute to slow service?  I knew my vested interest in the topic precluded me from being truly objective.  This is why I asked one of them to write a post outlining her position.  I know from first hand experience that she is a good tipper and a very nice person.  Please refrain from death threats since she did do me a favor in writing this.  With that in mind, here is what she submitted:

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